To Members of the Philadelphia Coffee House Scene,
I bid you good day and “HELLO”. My NAME, I fear, is a name of relative importance and brings with it a certain level of GRAVITAS. I hesitate to introduce myself beginning with my name for it is a TITLE, which I subsequently must live up to. Certain expectations will be made for me; goals to attain, which I fear I will not be possible. It is not for a lacking sense of self-worth, but rather for a rational understanding that no one could live up to these expectations. However, I am truly CONFIDENT in my own ABILITIES. Believe me when I say that I am an IMPRESSIVE individual.
How impressive am I? Well, it would not be amiss for me to tell you that my feats of accomplishment have become the foundation for more outlandish myths to be told of my life relating to SUCCESS and INNOVATION. In my wisdom, I learned how to evade confirmation of these stories during my life, while still taking full advantage of the aura that it placed me in. This made me more successful in my different business, social, or political projects since I appeared of a higher quality to all other players. Sometimes it caused REVERENCE, but often it caused JEALOUSY amongst my contemporaries. Needless to say that, when I died, some were sad, some were relieved, and some – well they probably did not take heed.
And yes, I did, in fact, DIE. Though it was after a good long life. I enjoyed witnessing how my LEGEND flourished after my death, as many individuals in history do. I am PLEASED to see that my name and accomplishments have been imitated and improved to further ADVANCE individual and collective success throughout the years. An even greater reason for the growth of my EGO can be sighted in the area now known as OLDE CITY Philadelphia – an area that I had known simply as Philadelphia. You see, it would appear that I am the NAMESAKE of every other coffee shop, restaurant, street, bridge, and building. (Note: it is NOT ARROGANCE if it is the TRUTH…)
My name is appearing far more in the world of popular CULTURE. Music and entertainment often mention me in reference to, well…. EVERYTHING. That is what happens when my FACE is on the SYMBOL of CAPITALISM and POWER, the hundred-dollar bill. Who knew that being a JACK-OF-ALL-TRADES could propel one to such a level of prestige? This is precisely why I choose to grace you with my presence after all of these years.
I have decided that 2015 would be a good time to plunge back into the realm of the living. This world is an exciting place with various forms of communication and technology that overwhelm all who were born before 1990. Since I died in 1790, I will not, needless to say, spend too much time attempting to catch up with technology. There is far too much technological evolution for me to try to understand. (Note: it took 30 more years after I died for someone to create the bicycle… so I would really be starting from the beginning.)
Instead, I have decided to focus my thoughts and writings within the realm of SOCIETY. I have always had a keen sense of people and I do find my sharp witticisms take hold within well-focused niches of society, most specifically, yours. Yes YOU, the coffee shop dwellers; the artisans; the students; the young professionals. You are free spirits and free thinkers. I sense that we are not so different. Therefore, I consider it my DUTY to ENTERTAIN and PROVOKE THOUGHT in a light manner so that I may help you IMPROVE your outlook, even if only slightly. Topics of discussion shall vary but shall always revolve around people and SOCIETY. I do hope that you appreciate my RHETORIC for what it is, the thoughtful musings of a very, very, old soul who is always quick to alter his opinions if persuaded through LOGIC and WISDOM.
I will leave this letter with this quick description of my CHARACTER: I am COURTEOUS and AFFABLE, unless I am provoked. I am a lover of all GOOD PEOPLE and a true friend to VIRTUE. I am HANDSOME and usually quite WITTY; and therefore struggle with HUMILITY. However, I am open to acknowledgement of my flaws, whatever they be. I shall look to you, as my friends, to ensure that I do not make too much of a fool of myself, since I intend to do the same to you as a whole. With this introduction, I wish for you a good day and good coffee! Until next time….
Your Best Friend,